The Republic of The Republic of Goat is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by President Goat with an even hand, and renowned for its compulsory military service, anti-smoking policies, and sprawling nuclear power plants. The compassionate, democratic, devout population of 15.592 billion Republic of Goatians enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Chernobyl. The average income tax rate is 89.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Republic of Goatian economy, worth a remarkable 2,391 trillion Groats a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 153,396 Groats, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Soldiers on first dates introduce themselves only by their ranks and serial numbers, actively encouraging climate change is helping reduce winter fuel costs, brave curators do battle with disorganised government libraries, and endangered bison are herded across the border to prevent them from trampling on native prairie grass. Crime is totally unknown. The Republic of Goat's national animal is the Goat, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Armenian orthodox.

The Republic of Goat is ranked 8,670^th in the world and 1^st in Armenia for Highest Food Quality, scoring 170.51 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.